I miss you. I’m missing out.

Once again I am packing my suitcase. Once again I am counting down the days. I am going on holiday. Holidays at home.

It’s been about four months since my last trip to Germany, and I cannot wait to see my loved ones again. Less than a week to go!

I got two weeks off, which will be my longest stay since I left Germany, and even though I have nothing planned really it will be busy.

There are a lot of things happening at the moment and me living in London means that I miss out on most of them.

My cousins just had their babies – two gorgeous little baby girls. The Bestie moved in her first apartment. My Princess and the little Rock star are growing and learning and exploring more and more of the world every day. My brother started his first job. And so on….

Of course I get pictures and emails and I text and Skype and phone them all on a regular basis, but it’s not the same as actually being there.

And it’s not just about the big changes; it’s the small things that I miss the most. Hanging out with my girls. Being unproductive with the Bestie. My old room and the view. Watching telly with the Mumsy. Having breakfast with my brother. Being able to see the stars. Playing with the tabbies. These are the things I miss the most when I’m away.

Don’t get me wrong, I love living here. I choose to do so and I have no plans of changing this in the near future. But it does suck that I am not there to see all those wonderful things happening. And it sucks that I can’t share this beautiful city with them.

But when I’m down I just pick up the phone and call my ladies or my family (wish I could call my cats as well), and that makes it a whole lot easier.

The Boat Party

A few days ago my company threw a boat party! Wicked, innit!

Right after work I changed shoes and we boarded the boat that would take us for a few rounds on the Thames. First thing I realised: new high heels on a boat are really not a good idea…

We started our night of wobbliness with a cool glass of white and turned the cabin into a dance floor. I work for an amazing company and being a fun person is actually in the job description so every time we have a work-related event it’s not just all business but a good old laugh as well.

I’ve done little boat trips but I’ve not been on the Thames before so it was wonderful to see beautiful London pass by while the sun was slowly setting. And of course there had to be food! We had a huge buffet and a BBQ and – CHOCOLATE CAKE! Delicious!

I was wearing new super amazing heels and I was so exciting about their first outing but after about 1,5 hours I had to give in and swop my heels for flats, because let’s face it ladies, dancing is so much more fun in flats! And it’s no real party without a little karaoke! Doesn’t have to sound great, just give it all you’ve got.

We had about 4 hours on the boat and once the sun was down and the lights of London came out to play the view was incredible. I am a sucker for big city lights and passing all those bridges and buildings was another reminder of why love this place so much! Fabulous!

Honestly, I had a ball and if you come to London and it isn’t raining, and you want to spend a few hours partying while enjoying the city’s lights go grab some mates, get on a boat and turn up the beat!

The Lies You Told Me by Jessica Ruston

Blurb:

When Klara was a child her mother vanished from her life. All she has left is a handful of stories, passed down from the father who raised her. Klara believes she has long ago come to terms with her mother’s disappearance, but then she receives a note and a key from someone who call themselves ‘N.R’. These lead her to a store room, full of the remnants of her mother’s past, Klara discovers a woman who doesn’t quite match the portrait her father had painstakingly painted for her, and a story that leads her to question everything – and everyone – she thought she knew…

My thoughts:

I got his book at the GLAMOUR book club event I’ve told you about and I was over the moon when Jessica Ruston signed my copy. I couldn’t wait to start reading.

This beautiful book will take you on a rollercoaster of emotions!

It all starts with the letter and key Klara receives in the mail. She doesn’t know who N.R. is and she’s certainly didn’t know that there is a store room full of her mother’s belongings. The content of the store room and all the unanswered questions - new and old - send Klara on a journey she will never forget as she discovers who Sadie really was.

I’ve loved this book from the start! The characters are fascinating and so is each of their stories. Even when I wasn’t reading I was trying to figure out what would happen next, and most importantly, what happened to Klara’s mother? Why is her father lying? What kind of life did Sadie lead? And why had she disappeared?

The Lies You Told Me is a must-read!  It’s a trip down memory lane you won’t forget that easily.

Billy and Me by Giovanna Fletcher

Blurb:

Sophie May has a secret.

One that she’s successfully kept for years. It’s meant that she’s had to give up her dreams of going to university and travelling the world to stay in her little village, living with her mum and working in the local teashop.

But then she meets the gorgeous Billy – an actor with ambitions to make it to the top. And when they fall in love, Sophie is whisked away from the comfort of her life into Billy’s glamorous – but ruthless – world.

Their relationship throws Sophie right into the spotlight after years of shying away from attention. Can she handle the constant scrutiny that comes with being with Billy? And most of all, is she ready for her secret heartbreak to be discovered and shared with the nation?

My thoughts:

I’ve loved this book – totally and absolutely!

Sophie May and Billy Busking meet at the location of the heartthrob’s new movie and it’s not long before the first picture of them hit the newsstands.

When Sophie decides to leave the familiar and quite streets of Rosefont Hill behind and joins Billy in his nifty apartment in central London she has to realise that being the girlfriend of a man in the spotlight is not just glamorous. Sophie discovers that there is a lot more going on behind the scenes than she’d have thought.

Billy and Sophie try to build a relationship between award shows, designer clothes, coffee, ex-girlfriends and the busy streets of London. And there is something in Sophie’s past that Billy has not heard about yet.

I've been looking forward to reading Billy and Me ever since Giovanna Fletcher announced that she’d be publishing her debut novel in 2013. It was well worth the wait.

This is the perfect book to read in the sun, giving the characters and plot your full attention while you soak up your Vitamin D. You won’t be able to resist Molly, Sophie, Billy and Sophie’s mum while they're all trying to find their way – in and out. It’s a beautiful story about friendship, dreams and love.

One more thing – have your tissues ready!

Books and the Summer

It is HOT in London. The papers call it heat wave, I call it summer.

I have spent my last few days grilling in the sun and reading. Go British summer!

And I had two truly brilliant books to read. I went to the GLAMOUR book club live event on July 3^rd at the The Condé Nast College of Fashion & Design. It was absolutely GLAMOURous! Jessica Ruston, author of The Lies You Told Me, and Adele Parks, who’s latest release The State We’re In just hit the shelves, came to talk about their books, writing and the business.

We were greeted with a glass of bubbly and snacks to nibble at, which we enjoyed during the discussing. I even had the chance to have a small chat with Adele Parks before we all sat down.

Afterwards we got the chance to buy the new books and get them signed. How every exciting! My first signed copies! And GLAMOUR wouldn’t let us leave empty-handed either. We all got a GLAMOUR goodie bag filled with nice lotions, creams and sprays to treat ourselves with – and some delicious chocolate.

It was an amazing event which gave me the chance to ask questions, meeting new and exciting people, and spent an entire evening listening and talked about something I am passionate about – books. I really hope GLAMOUR will host another book club event soon!

The reviews for The State We’re In and The Lies You Told Me will be up on the blog soon. But I tell you this – they’re both page-turners!

The Big O(h)!

Well, it’s been a long way from thinking about writing this to actually doing it. Not because I wasn’t sure, but because I wasn’t ready. But now I am – ready to talk about The Big O.

I am in my early twenties and I have just gotten over The Big O. What is The Big O, you ask, and what with the capital letters? The Big O is similar to The One. You are in love; you can’t imagine anyone else by your side. It’s serious and you fantasies about your future and you ask yourself how the hell you’ve getting into this. Big difference: He is NOT The One.

You might not call him The Big O; you might call him arsehole, the first you’ve ever loved, THAT one, you-know-who or simply ex-boyfriend. But he’s there, in your past. A lesson you had to learn, and boy, did you learn!

I had been friends with The Big O for years and to be completely honest, I haven’t got a clue how this all happened. But it did. I fell in love. Gradually, I guess. It wasn’t like I woke up one morning and BAM I was in love, no. It was more like watching someone paint a picture. First, you have no idea what this is supposed to be, but as the artist adds more layers, more colour, you slowly start to recognise shapes and once he’s finished you go “Of course!”.

Even before my big ah-ha moment I had spent countless nights, texts and energy trying to please him, managing my days so I would see him as much as possible. About 3 years. But I didn’t mind. We were friends. We had fun.

But then I decided to do something for myself and left the country. We kept in touch over the year and I can’t even count all the I-miss-yous and I-wish-we-were-heres and everything-sucks-withouts he threw across the Atlantic.  But by the time I got back he had a new girlfriend. Our relationship was over before it could even begin.

But the story doesn’t end here. What’s a new girlfriend? Sneaking a kiss, unspoken promises… it didn’t stop. I spent months trying to decipher everything he did and said, and I went out of my way to make sure we saw each other. But after four months I was drained. He was still with his girlfriend, and I was still his puppet. And by the beginning of autumn he was gone, and I was a crying, exhausted pile of sadness. We had stopped seeing each other over the summer. No more chasing, no more flirting. I didn’t know how to go on without him but I knew I couldn’t keep doing this either.

It’s thanks to my wonderful friends that I got my shit together so quickly. They let me mourn and be sad and always offered a shoulder to cry on – literally. But when the time came, they kicked my arse and reminded me of what I had, despite all the things (or someone) I didn’t.

Just the other day I was talking to one of my girls about him and she said: “Honestly, for a long time I didn’t think you’d get over him.” And it made me realise how far I’d come over the last year.

Maybe your Big O is someone you had an actually relationship with, or someone you’d loved and got rejected by, or someone who doesn’t even know your name – but you gave him or her all you’ve got, and it broke your heart.

But the good news is, you will get over it. Maybe it’ll take a year, a rebound crush and moving countries, but you will.

Hamburg's city lights

I spent my last day in Germany with all my favourite people. I saw my girl Marlain and the Bestie and ended the night on the sofa watching a movie with the Mumsy.

The last night is always the hardest because I am torn between going out and staying in. Times like that I do wish I could be in more than one place at the same time.

But let me tell you about Marlain’s and my trip to Hamburg….

We left early Monday morning, ready to explore the North. And against all odds, we did make it in less than 10 hours and in one piece; quite alive too. Our to-do list was quite long and we managed to do…nothing. No, not true.

We walked along the river, which I was very much looking forward to and we even had our own private city guide who, I am sure, has missed walking along the water with me. Unfortunately, I was raining cats and dogs so it was not as great as it could have been. I, living in London, was not much bothered by the wet weather but my girl was very much against spending the night catching a cold so we got hot chocolate and Marlain even lost her falafel virginity.

One thing you can’t miss out on in Hamburg is the Reeperbahn, which is lined with sex shops, brothels and the like. I think it might look a bit creepier during the day than at night but interesting nonetheless. We did not enter one of those buildings, sorry to disappoint on the naughty news front here.

And because we were on holiday we decided to treat ourselves to a few happy hour 4 pm cocktails. Yum! Oh and food, lots and lots of delicious food!

I have to admit, I pictured Hamburg a little differently. Not really more beautiful but maybe more…exciting? When we planned this trip we talked about bars and clubs filled with young, hot, well-dressed people partying the night away, downing shots and popping champagne bottles.

Didn't see any of that. I’m not saying that doesn't happen, we might have just ended up exploring the wrong nightlife part of the city.

But to be fair, tropical cocktails and a good old laugh with my girl is more fun than any club could ever be!

So we left Hamburg with a slight hangover, drenched clothes and – as always – loads of wonderful memories.

Was Hamburg worth the trip? Definitely! The food is incredible up there! Just make sure it won’t rain when you want to go…

I do miss my old room, and my loved ones and sometimes even the quite, but for the first time since I came to London I felt like I could leave Germany without freaking out about it. I usually worry myself sick about everything that might happen while I’m gone but this time I felt like… it’s gonna be okay.

And now that the sun has decided to finally show its face in London, I am (almost) ready for another wonderful summer in the city!