Bye bye, 2013

Oh there it is: the last day of 2013.

I cannot believe the year’s over already! It’s gone so quickly… I just love how the city is buzzing with excitement. Everyone has put on something nice and sparkly to welcome the new year.

2013 was a great one. I have settled more into my life in London now, got a permanent contract at work and I am still not tired of this beautiful city. Success!

But it had some rough patches as well. There was a lot to take in as I faced things that I have been avoiding for a very long time. Turns out there’s always something new to learn about yourself.

Luckily there is always a bright side to everything. So facing these issues has been one bumpy ride, yes, but it has shown me again how lucky I am to have such supportive and wonderful people in my life.

My friends have been very understanding and just never get tired of reminding me of the good things when I tend to see only the negative side. As well as my family, whose love and support give me so much strength.

And, boy, did I have good times this year. I’ve spent quite some time at airports going from England to Germany back to England and then four months later do it all over again. London blessed me with another beautiful, warm summer filled with adventures. And going to the pub with ze Jules and other colleagues or spending a day at Westfields with Fatima is adding up to many, many hours of laughter, drinks and food.

And I’ve gotten back into dancing, which will hopefully stay in my life for ever now.

This year was about learning and accepting and having fun. And it was fantastic. Thank you, 2013.

So I don’t have any specific goals for 2014. No long list of things to do or fixed plans to stick to. 2014 is going to be about improvement, preparation and security.

I have to keep my finances is check, mate! And I will probably spend a lot of time studying my buttocks off – these A levels are not gonna write themselves….unfortunately. Another big thing for me will be feeling secure – in relationships and about myself.

And now it's just a couple of hours until midnight…

But tonight I am going to stay inside, have a little piece of chocolate cake and watch the fireworks in my jim-jams.

I wish you all a very happy new year. May 2014 bring you loads of love, laughter and happiness – and a pocket full of magic!

Christmas at Home

Here we are again. I have just arrived in Frankfurt airport and am now on my way back to my place in the wilderness. Kidding.

It is very late and I am running on about 5 hours of sleep. Last minute packing – not again. But I made it. Getting up, going to work, working, getting to the airport, flying, leaving the airport.

And even tho I am pretty knackered I could not help but notice that Frankfurt is getting more charming with every return. Staff at the airport is so nice, their smile could freeze hell. And the helpful guy who charged my 6 quid for two bottles of iced tea. And changing trains in Germany is a bitch.

But it’s all good and it’s all worth it. Because I can be home for Christmas! I will have food and pressies and cocktails and more food. Food until I pass out! And we will put up a huge tree and lots of Christmas light. I am gonna Christmas the shit out of this one, people!

Have you got all your lights and trees and presents out already, guys? Or are you really late to the party?

I was a bit down last year because I could not be with my family for Christmas due to work. It wasn’t too bad, I had a very nice English Christmas (including the veggies from hell – Brussel sprouts!) with a bunch of lovely people. But it’s just not the same….

So I am even more excited this year. Christmas is, as you might know by now, my favourite time of the year and I love our traditional meal (which is not very traditional) and being with the family and my ladies. Plus, this year we will have two little gems at our table and Mama K and the Princess are back as well.

Oh, I have to get off the train… I hope you’ll all have a wonderful, magical Christmas. Let’s hope Santa brings you a load full of awesomeness!

Oh So Fabulous!

Carrie Hope Fletcher, who’s currently starring as Eponine in Les Miserables at the Queen’s Theatre in London, uploaded a pretty amazing video about being healthy and happy. Please take a few minutes to watch it.

Well, I am not as confident as Carrie, so no measuring. But I do love the message of this video.

Love yourself! Be okay with the way you look! You ARE beautiful! Yes, you can wear that!

Believe me when I say that I do know what it feels like to not be comfortable in your own skin. It’s a pretty shitty feeling. And there are still days were I feel bloated and fat and like dressing in a bed sheet so no one will see my wobbly bits. But that’s okay. Because the next day - or even the day after that - I will feel fabulous in my new dress or favourite top.

And please, please, don’t let ANYONE make you feel crap because of what they think of your weigh, height, size, colour, hair… This is you. You are the only person who has to like it.

There will always be someone who won’t like your outfit or your hair colour but the good news is that it doesn’t matter. You are not here to please everyone.

If you want to lose a few pounds, fine, why not. As long as you do it the healthy way and don’t harm yourself or others. If you want to put on some weight, hells yeah! Whatever makes you feel most comfortable and happy – do it!

Sometimes, when I’m extra happy I put on one of my favourite “feelin’ sexy” tunes and have a little dance. Here are a few. Listen and let go, babes:

Jessie J – Sexy Lady

Alicia Keys – Girl On Fire 

McFLY – Party Girl 

Ellie Goulding – Burn 

Scouting for Girls – She’s So Lovely 

Shirley Bassey – Big Spender 

ABBA – Dancing Queen

I hope that Carrie’s video and this post have made your day a little bit brighter. You look fabulous, you ARE fabulous!

Billy and Me by Giovanna Fletcher

Blurb:

Sophie May has a secret.

One that she’s successfully kept for years. It’s meant that she’s had to give up her dreams of going to university and travelling the world to stay in her little village, living with her mum and working in the local teashop.

But then she meets the gorgeous Billy – an actor with ambitions to make it to the top. And when they fall in love, Sophie is whisked away from the comfort of her life into Billy’s glamorous – but ruthless – world.

Their relationship throws Sophie right into the spotlight after years of shying away from attention. Can she handle the constant scrutiny that comes with being with Billy? And most of all, is she ready for her secret heartbreak to be discovered and shared with the nation?

My thoughts:

I’ve loved this book – totally and absolutely!

Sophie May and Billy Busking meet at the location of the heartthrob’s new movie and it’s not long before the first picture of them hit the newsstands.

When Sophie decides to leave the familiar and quite streets of Rosefont Hill behind and joins Billy in his nifty apartment in central London she has to realise that being the girlfriend of a man in the spotlight is not just glamorous. Sophie discovers that there is a lot more going on behind the scenes than she’d have thought.

Billy and Sophie try to build a relationship between award shows, designer clothes, coffee, ex-girlfriends and the busy streets of London. And there is something in Sophie’s past that Billy has not heard about yet.

I've been looking forward to reading Billy and Me ever since Giovanna Fletcher announced that she’d be publishing her debut novel in 2013. It was well worth the wait.

This is the perfect book to read in the sun, giving the characters and plot your full attention while you soak up your Vitamin D. You won’t be able to resist Molly, Sophie, Billy and Sophie’s mum while they're all trying to find their way – in and out. It’s a beautiful story about friendship, dreams and love.

One more thing – have your tissues ready!

The Big O(h)!

Well, it’s been a long way from thinking about writing this to actually doing it. Not because I wasn’t sure, but because I wasn’t ready. But now I am – ready to talk about The Big O.

I am in my early twenties and I have just gotten over The Big O. What is The Big O, you ask, and what with the capital letters? The Big O is similar to The One. You are in love; you can’t imagine anyone else by your side. It’s serious and you fantasies about your future and you ask yourself how the hell you’ve getting into this. Big difference: He is NOT The One.

You might not call him The Big O; you might call him arsehole, the first you’ve ever loved, THAT one, you-know-who or simply ex-boyfriend. But he’s there, in your past. A lesson you had to learn, and boy, did you learn!

I had been friends with The Big O for years and to be completely honest, I haven’t got a clue how this all happened. But it did. I fell in love. Gradually, I guess. It wasn’t like I woke up one morning and BAM I was in love, no. It was more like watching someone paint a picture. First, you have no idea what this is supposed to be, but as the artist adds more layers, more colour, you slowly start to recognise shapes and once he’s finished you go “Of course!”.

Even before my big ah-ha moment I had spent countless nights, texts and energy trying to please him, managing my days so I would see him as much as possible. About 3 years. But I didn’t mind. We were friends. We had fun.

But then I decided to do something for myself and left the country. We kept in touch over the year and I can’t even count all the I-miss-yous and I-wish-we-were-heres and everything-sucks-withouts he threw across the Atlantic.  But by the time I got back he had a new girlfriend. Our relationship was over before it could even begin.

But the story doesn’t end here. What’s a new girlfriend? Sneaking a kiss, unspoken promises… it didn’t stop. I spent months trying to decipher everything he did and said, and I went out of my way to make sure we saw each other. But after four months I was drained. He was still with his girlfriend, and I was still his puppet. And by the beginning of autumn he was gone, and I was a crying, exhausted pile of sadness. We had stopped seeing each other over the summer. No more chasing, no more flirting. I didn’t know how to go on without him but I knew I couldn’t keep doing this either.

It’s thanks to my wonderful friends that I got my shit together so quickly. They let me mourn and be sad and always offered a shoulder to cry on – literally. But when the time came, they kicked my arse and reminded me of what I had, despite all the things (or someone) I didn’t.

Just the other day I was talking to one of my girls about him and she said: “Honestly, for a long time I didn’t think you’d get over him.” And it made me realise how far I’d come over the last year.

Maybe your Big O is someone you had an actually relationship with, or someone you’d loved and got rejected by, or someone who doesn’t even know your name – but you gave him or her all you’ve got, and it broke your heart.

But the good news is, you will get over it. Maybe it’ll take a year, a rebound crush and moving countries, but you will.

Four sexy beasts and a beautiful city

Okay, someone please give me a time machine so I can go back to the weekend. Because it has been perfect!

I got last Thursday off so I had plenty of time to pack my bags - but I didn't. I've spent all day being lazy and looking forward to leaving this country. Thursday evening was spent throwing around clothes and shoes, trying to find something I could take to London. Clever, organized me.

And then, finally, Friday - off to beautiful London! With packed bags and full of excitement I went over to the bestie. To the airport, on the plane, here we go.
I love flying. It's amazing. Wooop.
We had to travle across London to get from Gatwick to our hotel, so we got there pretty late and were pretty exhausted. After a mini heartattack when the front desk ladie told us our rooms were not paid yet, which we were able to sort out, we went up to floor number 2 and I spent the rest of the night enjoying british TV. (This seems to happen to us every time we want to check into a hotel in London...)

When I woke up on Saturday I coudn't believe I was going to see my favourite band in less than 12 hours. Exciteeeed! We took the tube to Hammersmith, got some food and then headed to the Apollo. Then we waited. And waited. And waited. Six hours of waiting in the cold, sitting on the ground, trying to believe that I was about to see McFly live.

Honestly, I couldn't wait for the two supporting acts to finish and then it happened. YMCA. Just a few more seconds...
I can't describe how I felt when the boys came on stage. Amazing! They played three new songs and now I can't wait for the new album. It's gonna be incredible, I tell you. And yes - Tom Fletcher is perfection.
It was a sweaty, beautiful, hot, crowded night and my body was still hurting three days after. I loved it.

On Sunday we went into London. I have met some pretty amazing people, who I will tell you more about in another post.
London is wonderful. Although it was raining and freezing cold I fell in love with this beautiful, expensive, lovely, busy city all over again. Is it weird that big cities make me happy?

Can't wait to see you again, London.

Picture Perfect Moments

Brrrrr, hello there.
I hope you are all well wrapped up. I've got to say, this weather is not for me. I do not like it - at all. Way way too cold! Unfortunately I have no useful tips to stay warm... just put as much clothes on as possibly and do not leave your bed!

I'm quite bored and when this happens (and it happens a lot), my thoughts tend to wander... So, I've just been thinking about how I don't ever take pictures anymore. I've used to snap a shot of everything I could get my lens on! But ever since I got back from America my camera has been removed from my purse... I'm not sure why. But it really saddens me when I think about all the amazing moments I could have captured.
Got to admit, I don't own a expensive cam. I've got mine for like $150 at a discounter because I was in desperate need of one, but I still like the pictures I get with it.

Photographs are something that have always fascinated me. I just love the idea of capturing a moment and being able to go back whenever you like. And although I am a person of words, some photos just express something that words never could.

I will try and get back into taking pictures. There is so much I want to remember... Plus, the Bestie and I used to take the most hilarious pics ever!
So, hopefully you'll find some new shots on here soon.


Loads of love flying you way. Xx